


The Cut-Off Point

by d0g-bless (d0gbless)



Series: A New Breed of Training [16]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Babies, Breastfeeding, F/M, Kid Fic, Mention of SIDS, Next Generation, Nudity, Parenthood, Post-Canon, Post-Series, Postpartum Depression, SHIDGE, mention of domestic abuse, shidge and a dog
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-21
Updated: 2019-04-21
Packaged: 2020-01-23 11:35:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18548965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/d0gbless/pseuds/d0g-bless
Summary: In which Shiro is recognized for being a good dad, Pidge is fed up and gets a haircut, and Sammy and Halley get the police involved.





	The Cut-Off Point

**Author's Note:**

> In case you all were worried I was dead or had forgotten about this... let it be known that I am alive and risen from the grave of... well, trying to write this hot mess of a fic.
> 
> tl;dr
> 
> Happy easter.

Dawn’s pale pink brushed over the night sky in Phoenix, Arizona. The sight pulled on Pidge’s heartstrings and made her want to run out of the house barefoot with her dog at her heels and husband at her side, and together, the three of them would leap into the Green Lion’s jaws and explore the skies and universe.

But she did no such thing. Instead, Pidge sat on her side of the bed and occasionally looked out the window to watch the dusty pink melt away the darkness of night. The morning was a silent one, save for the snores of her husband. But after eight years of being together and living together, Shiro’s snores were white noise to her. They were one of the sounds she was used to hearing at her home at night. No, his snores were a sound she _expected_ to hear at night.

And so were the cries of a baby.

Pidge had quickly learned the pregnant belly was a magnet for unsolicited touches and advice. It had drawn complete strangers who had the gall to say almost _anything_ without a second thought, though she remembered one particular phrase she heard all the time:

“Sleep while you can because the baby will keep you up all night.”

Well-meaning that tidbit of advice may have been, but it was incredibly unhelpful, if anything. Unhelpful when she was pregnant because the baby already _did_ keep her up all night. Unhelpful now because the baby’s cries did _not_ keep her up all night.

In the following weeks since she and Shiro had brought Sammy home, Sammy had cried only once, and that had been on her first day out of the hospital.

She didn’t cry when she was hungry; instead, she stuck her tongue out. Shiro affectionately dubbed Sammy’s hungry tongue thing “the blep” and prided himself on coming up with it, as if he had no clue that it was something people on the internet already said about animals’ tongues. (Maybe he really didn’t know what a blep was. Well, at least he’d gotten the context right.)

She didn’t cry if she needed her diaper changed. She didn’t cry if she woke up from her nap or even if she needed a nap. She just didn’t cry.

Sammy was quiet, if not almost silent, and that put Pidge on edge, especially at night. So far, it seemed like Sammy wasn’t going to be a night owl like her parents were. She didn’t have the shared trauma of being war veterans like her mom and dad. No night terrors or panic attacks or general sleep avoidance; she was a blank slate untouched by the horrors of war.

 _Lucky,_ Pidge thought as she rocked the cradle Keith had so lovingly handcrafted for his niece. What impressed her the most about it was the fact it surpassed modern safety regulations. She could practically feel the cut of his blade in the wooden frame and the hours he’d spent sanding it down with only the touch of a finger. For all his anxiousness around Sammy, Keith sure loved her an awful lot.

The cradle’s occupant stared up at Pidge, which only gave her mother only a fraction of relief. Still, Pidge couldn’t help but worry that the moment she closed her eyes and fell asleep, her own breathing would stop Sammy’s somehow. It didn’t matter to Pidge that Sammy was at lower risk of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome because she slept in a cradle next to her; it was still a risk. Maybe she was anal (okay, she absolutely was anal about this), but if Sammy died on her watch, Pidge wouldn’t be able to forgive herself.

She was so focused on Sammy that she barely noticed the ruffling of sheets beside her. “You’re up early,” Shiro said through a yawn.

“I’m not the only one,” Pidge said softly.

“Did I wake you up? Or did she?”

 _I wish she did._ Pidge shook her head. “Couldn’t sleep.”

“Since you’re awake, maybe we could go on a morning walk?”

Walk?! Halley’s ears perked at Metalpaw’s suggestion, though the rest of her remained stationary at the feet of Puppy’s bassinet.

Pidge almost agreed to it, then panic seized her heart. “What about Sammy? I can’t just leave her here, I can’t.” She felt the cool and warm presence of Shiro’s hands settle on her shoulders and tighten and relax, tighten and relax, tighten and relax… A soft moan slipped through her lips.

“Which is why we’d take her with us. We have one of those wrap carriers, remember?”

“It’s hard to remember anything when you distract me with your shoulder massages.”

Shiro grinned sheepishly. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be. It felt nice.” Pidge scooped Sammy up from the bassinet and held her against her chest.

“Good,” he said. Shiro reached for a clean shirt he’d left at the foot of the bed the night before. “Do you want some breakfast?”

“I’m not hungry, and neither is she. Tried feeding her a few minutes before you woke up.” She groaned. “My boobs _hurt_.” If she hadn’t been holding Sammy, Pidge would have flopped back down on the bed and passed out for an hour or two.

“In that case, why don’t I carry Sammy, and you take Halley?”

Pidge’s sleep-deprived mind conjured up an image of a shirtless Shiro, all beefy toned muscle and sharp sculpted angles at odds with his soft, shy smile, parading down a trail with Sammy strapped to his chest, fitted perfectly between his manly tits.

She worked her hair back into a sleek ponytail. “That sounds lovely.”

* * *

Pidge’s daydream about walking with her husband neglected a few things.

For starters, Shiro wore a shirt. She didn’t particularly care about that aspect too much, though it would’ve been nice to at least get a better view than the one she currently had of his backside. Yes, he had a nice butt, but it wasn’t his best feature, but she was stuck behind it, which brought her to the next point.

It failed to consider her current state of fitness. Pidge’s legs felt like gelatin as she huffed and puffed to keep up with Shiro. She knew she was out of shape, but she hadn’t realized just how much of a toll pregnancy had truly taken on her.

Her fantasy also didn’t include Halley — or at least the fact she’d be the one walking the dog. It also didn’t help that Shiro must’ve eased up on reinforcing Halley’s walking manners while Pidge had been out of commission. Halley pulled and tugged on her leash, practically dragging Pidge to and fro at the scent and sound of every small critter in a 30-yard radius and back toward Shiro.

If Halley kept this up, Pidge just might end up with a cybernetic arm that perfectly matched her husband’s. _Except I’d add a few more specs to it, like making it extend to places that are too high for me to reach._

Pidge’s fantasy about being able to grab a jar of peanut butter from the top of the fridge was cut off by a pair of shrill coos:

“Aww! What an adorable baby! Krissy! Krissy, look at her!”

Krissy, a short, plump woman who might very well have been the first woman’s sister based on their shared bad tans and nearly identical dirty blonde hair, squealed at the sight. The main difference between them is where Krissy was round, her companion was thin and lean. “Oh, my goodness, Sharon, she’s beautiful!”

Shiro slowed his walk to a gentle stop, as to avoid jerking Sammy around. Her neck wasn’t strong enough to support her head, and even though he and Pidge had selected a chest carrier designed for a newborn, it was always better to play it safe. “Thank you!”

“It is _so_ nice to see a dad being so involved with their kid,” Sharon said. “They just don’t make ‘em like this anymore!”

Pride swelled in Shiro’s chest, though his face grew hot from the praise. “I mean, I’m going to stay at home to care for her, so of course I’m involved!”

The women cooed even more, much to Pidge’s annoyance. She gritted her teeth when one of them declared, “That’s _so_ brave of you!” The hell it was. There was nothing brave about either of them, her or Shiro, staying home or going to work. It’s just what they decided to do.

“Right, Sharon? God, I can’t imagine abandoning my kids for work.”

Finally, Pidge caught up to Shiro, slick with sweat, jaw and fists clenched tight. _Shiro, you’d better say something._

He ran a hand across the nape of his neck and bellowed out a hollow laugh. “Uh, yeah, anyways, I’d better get going.”

“Wait, wait, wait. I _have_ to know, how old is she?”

“Almost 13 weeks.”

Shiro’s response elicited a pair of horrified gasps. “She’s too small? Is she being fed enough? Her mom isn’t starving her, is she?” Sharon took a step closer to Shiro and lowered herself to get a closer look at Sammy with a scrunched-up expression, presumably eyeballing every little thing wrong with her.

Halley growled. She did not like these strangers getting so close to Puppy… and she could tell Peanut didn’t like it, either.

Forgetting everything she’d been taught about walks and manners, Halley lunged toward the tiny pack of women.

“Halley, no!”

Not only had Halley forgotten walking manners, but also that Peanut was on the other end of the leash. Had Metalpaw been holding it, Halley would not have been able to move forward.

Peanut, however, was much lighter and therefore easier to lug around like a bag of dog food.

Halley’s lunge knocked Pidge off-balance and face-first into the ground, dragging her along at a brisk pace. Pidge squeezed her eyes shut, clinging to the leash for dear life — and possibly for the safety of whoever Halley was targeting.

“Are you alright?”

Pidge cracked an eye open and found herself staring at a pair of purple Crocs. “I’m fine. Just a couple scrapes.” A half-truth. Aside from her scraped-up knees, she was physically fine, but emotionally, she was seriously injured. “We are going to have a _long_ talk about Halley’s walking habits when we go home.”

With one hand pressed against Sammy’s carrier as he bent over, Shiro helped Pidge back up to her feet. “And how about I take Halley for the rest of the walk?”

Pidge handed Shiro the leash. “Please.”

“That wild… thing is _your_ dog?” Krissy looked like a ripe tomato, her face crimson with fury. “You let that mongrel around your baby?”

Before either Shiro or Pidge could get a word in, Sharon’s lips drew back in a snarl. “Your dog is a danger to society, lunging at people like that. If I see that dog walking on these trails again, I’m going to call animal control. And you!” She pointed a perfectly manicured finger at Pidge. “You need to feed your baby more. I thought she’s only a week or two old, she’s so little! Consider yourself lucky that you have a husband like him. If not, I’d call CPS on you. She’d be better off there than with you alone, I’m sure of that!” Sharon spat at the ground, nearly hitting Pidge’s sneaker.

“Let’s go, Sharon.” The women continued their walk like nothing happened, save for the malevolent glares they’d shoot at the small family every so often until they were out of view.

“Guess I’ll have to find a new route for walks.” Though Shiro didn’t put stock into their threats — these women were all hot air, or so he tried to tell himself — he wasn’t going to risk Halley. “It’ll be good. We won’t have to deal with them again, isn’t that right, Sammy?”

Shiro wouldn’t, but Pidge knew she probably would. Not Krissy and Sharon in particular, but people _like_ them.

“Look, Pidge, she’s doing the blep!”

Despite the rage burning through her core, Pidge managed to smile at that. No matter how many times Sammy did something, anything, she had a feeling Shiro would always react like it was the first time, like it was some miraculous event. It was adorable. “Guess that means we should head home so she can have her breakfast.”

“Or we could keep walking? There’s a bench not too far away if you want to stop and feed her now.”

 _And make myself an open target for breastfeeding in public while you do nothing to defend me like earlier? No thanks._ “I’d rather just do it at home.”

“Then that’s where we’ll go.” Shiro wound Halley’s leash around his wrist for extra control, and with Pidge’s assistance, he made sure Sammy was good to go before they made the trek back home.

* * *

“Sit.”

Halley did as she was bidden and firmly planted her rear end on the entry way welcome mat, allowing Peanut’s nimble fingers to unhook her from the leash. She tried to stay still, though she wriggled with anticipation for Peanut to say:

“Okay.”

Upon hearing the follow-up command, Halley leapt upright, shook herself, then trotted around the corner.

“You got her, Pidge?”

“Almost.” Forehead puckered with concentration, Pidge’s hands trembled as they unbuckled and snapped the harness like devices holding Sammy in place. Her shaky hands did little to detract from her quick, accurate movements.

Once Sammy was entirely unbuckled, Pidge freed her from the carrier, slowly and oh-so-carefully adjusting her from what was almost an upright position to a cradle hold. “I’ve got her.”

“Make sure you’re supporting her head and neck.” Shiro pulled the carrier over his head in a way that made Pidge think of how they removed their Paladin helmets. “The crook of your elbow should be like a pillow. Don’t forget to —”

Pidge shot Shiro a dirty look. “I know what I’m doing.”

The coldness in her voice froze his muscles stiff. His facial muscles seemed warm enough to react with a wince and a reply. “I know you do. It’s just… I worry. I shouldn’t. I’m sorry.”

Had it not been for Sammy in her arms, Pidge would have pinched her nose and sighed deeply. “It’s fine.”

“It’s not fine, Pidge. What’s the matter?”

“I said it’s fine.”

Shiro didn’t buy that for even a second. Knowing his wife’s stubbornness, though, she wasn’t about to budge on it now. She’d talk later when she was ready, probably, meaning now was the time to change the subject. “In that case, I’m going to hit the shower.”

“Just make sure you don’t hit it too hard. That could hurt.”

“Ha, ha, very funny.” Shiro planted a kiss on Pidge’s temple and one atop Sammy’s head. “Well, you know where to find me.” With that, he jogged off toward the stairs, feet thumping with each step.

Pidge held Sammy closer to her chest as she limped to the sofa, each step aching more than the last. She sank into the sofa. Never again would she take this cushy piece of furniture for granted. Never again.

Halley sauntered over from the office and into the living room. Once she approached Pidge’s feet, she unleashed a muffled _boof!_ A sure sign she had something in her mouth. “Oh? What do we have here? Drop it.”

Halley joined her companion on the sofa and plopped a U-shaped pillow with a design of smiling lions, giraffes, and hippos on Pidge’s lap.

“Good girl!” Pidge scratched Halley behind the ear. “I completely forgot I’d left my nursing pillow in my office. You’re such a big help.” With one arm, she lifted Sammy up and quickly slipped the pillow around her waist, then set her back down. “It’s so much easier this way.” With one arm still cradled around Sammy, her free hand unclipped her green nursing tank top. Usually the extra fabric fell off, but today it was slick with sweat — or at least what Pidge _hoped_ was mostly sweat — and clung to Pidge’s breast as she peeled it back like a name tag on a T-shirt.

Sammy curled her tiny pink tongue in anticipation.

“Hungry, are we?” Nipple now free, Pidge positioned Sammy to latch on, and latch on she did — and finally on the first try! _Guess I’m getting better at this._

As Sammy sucked on Pidge’s tit like a Dyson vacuum cleaner, Pidge’s mind wandered.

She’d felt a pang of jealousy at the praise Shiro’d gotten just for saying he was going to be a stay-at-home dad. She was going to be the one working and missing out on some of Sammy’s first big moments. She was going to be the one dealing with achy tits because she wouldn’t be able to feed Sammy for hours. She was the brave one if anyone was. And no one would take her seriously. She doubted anyone would stop to even think before they said anything to Pidge the New Working Mom.

At least people took Pidge the Green Paladin seriously and listened to _that_ Pidge.

A tug on her ponytail pulled her out of her thoughts. “Done already?”

Sammy tightened her grip on her mom’s hair.

 _My hair._ “That’s it! You’re a genius, Sammy!” Pidge stood up, pillow still snug around her waist. The unexpected movement jostled Sammy from her meal, who gave an indignant grunt.

“Sorry, sorry, sorry!” Pidge lowered herself back down on the sofa and waited until Sammy was finished drinking her fill.

* * *

When Shiro and Pidge first moved into their house, it had needed a bit of work. Between Hunk’s engineering feats and Keith’s then-new hobby of woodworking, getting the place up to par hadn’t been much work at all. The more difficult work was compromising on stylistic differences.

Pidge liked modern minimalistic designs, the stuff anyone could find at IKEA or the nearest furniture store. No frills or fancy stuff; just the basics with an occasionally fun design. Function over fashion.

Shiro, on the other hand, had grown up in a more traditional Japanese home. He liked _tatami_ mats, sliding doors, and a _kotatsu_ for chilly winters in the living room. Of course, living in Phoenix presented challenges for using a _kotatsu_ , so he opted for a _furo,_ a soaking tub, in the bathroom instead.

After plenty of compromising, Shiro got his _furo_ and Pidge got her office.

The _furo_ was large enough for two adults — possibly three, though it’d be a squeeze — and deep enough for the bath water to come up to Shiro’s shoulders. He rarely filled it to that depth, mostly due to the water bill he’d incurred filling it that high the first time he used it. (Pidge had _not_ been happy about that.)

 _It was worth it if you ask me,_ Shiro thought as he stepped into the tub. Once seated, he tossed his head back, and his white forelock, still wet from his post-workout shower, flopped against the top of his head. He took a deep breath, letting the water drown the stress from the encounter from earlier. The _furo_ did wonders for relaxation — a rare thing for Shiro to experience, given all of the years of trauma he’d gone through. Not that soaking in the tub would ever cleanse him of that, or even of the crappy encounter with those women on the walk.

He couldn’t help but question his actions, or the lack thereof. They’d said terrible things about Pidge, but Pidge could handle it. She wasn’t the type who needed someone to fight her battles for her.

But her silence on the way back home was concerning. Shiro knew Pidge still wasn’t quite the same. He knew her postpartum depression wasn’t going to vanish, not even when Sammy came home, though a naïve part of him hoped it would.

For the time being, he’d just let her go about her day. If she needed to talk, she’d talk when she was ready. She wasn’t ready now, so maybe later she would be. Whenever that time was, he’d be there for her.

The door flew open and Pidge burst in with her hair down and a wide-eyed expression as she hurried over to the sink, clutching its sides in a white-knuckled grip.

 _Well, that was faster than I expected._ “Pidge? What’s wrong?”

“Hold my hair back.”

Though Shiro hadn’t taken up the role of hair-holder in months, it was a role he took on well and with pride.

Without a thought, Shiro drew himself up out of the tub and stood behind his wife, soaking wet and buck naked. He gathered her hair back, prepared for the worst. “It’s —”

There was a swift flash of green light that disappeared as soon as it had arrived, and all that was left behind was a fistful of Pidge’s light brown locks in Shiro’s hand.

“Jesus Christ, Pidge.”

The corners of her mouth twitched into a slight smirk. “Was that a ‘Jesus Christ, Pidge, you look amazing’?”

He shook his head as he scrambled for words as his brain attempted to process what just happened. “No,” he started, then began to pedal back when he saw Pidge’s face start to fall. “It’s not that, you look… you look…” Younger? No, that wasn’t right. Her eyes, as beautiful as ever, lacked the innocence they’d glimmered with when he’d first met her. War tended to have that effect on people. She didn’t like older or more mature, either; people still thought she was a teen, after all. Rather than finish the sentence, Shiro settled on, “I thought you were going to puke, not pull a Mulan.”

“I didn’t just use the Force to get that reaction.” Pidge’s gaze dropped to Shiro’s package. “But that does explain _that._ ”

 _And that explains the flash of green light; she summoned her bayard._ Feeling a bit like an amoeba being observed and studied under a microscope, Shiro reached for the towel he’d laid our next to the bath and wrapped it around his lower half. “What were you thinking, using your bayard like that?”

Pidge folded her arms across her chest. “That I needed a haircut.”

“Which you could have gotten at a salon or barbershop.”

Her hand reached to where long strands of hair had been moments ago, only to grip thin air — a pathetic attempt to feel in control of something, anything. “Not the way I needed it to look.”

Shiro massaged the back of his neck and sighed. “It does look good.” True, it was unexpected, but still good. “I take it you put Sammy down for a nap?”

Before Pidge could answer, a cry loud enough to split the earth in two broke through the bathroom door and through the sound barrier itself.

“Thank God, she’s crying.” Pidge spoke so quietly Shiro barely heard her over Sammy’s wails; nor could he catch how her voice wavered with restrained joy. _Sammy’s crying. She’s crying like a normal baby. Normal! She’s still breathing and she’s still OK and she’s still alive!_

* * *

Upon hearing Sammy’s first cry in weeks, Pidge felt relief wash over her.

One hour later, she began to have second thoughts.

After hours of nonstop screams and attempting pretty much everything the internet had to offer that wasn’t from a questionable source, Pidge felt nothing more than frazzled.

Worst yet, the cries were in stereo. Halley joined in Sammy’s sorrowful song with a chorus of lonesome howls and concerned whines and whimpers.

Counter to everything Pidge knew about her husband and his refusal to give up in even the direst of circumstances, the poor guy looked close to waving a white flag. Sammy had bested the both of them. “I’ve changed her diaper, rubbed her back, and I sang to her.” He trailed off, and Pidge filled in the blanks.

“Here, I’ll take her.”

Shiro, usually reluctant to hand Sammy over to anyone, including his own wife, transferred the wailing infant like she was a boiling pot of acid.

Halley barked at the exchange — Careful! Be careful!

“No.” Shiro spoke with a firmness Pidge had yet to hear him use on the dog.

Undeterred, Halley tilted her head back and howled.

“Halley, no,” he said, a little sterner this time. When Halley continued howling, he looked to Pidge, who gently bounced Sammy on her hip. “We need to call your mom. She’ll know what to do.”

The bouncing ceased. “Are you suggesting that I don’t know what I’m doing?”

“What?” Shiro’s response came out as a spluttering half-choke, half-laugh. “No! What makes you think —” The events from earlier in the morning came to mind. “You don’t think what those jerks said was true, do you?”

“Of course not!” she snapped. “I don’t believe them. I’m doing everything I can for her.”

“I know you are, and you’re doing amazing.” Shiro’s expression and voice softened.

Pidge’s, on the other hand, steeled. “Then why didn’t you tell them that? Why didn’t you defend me? Tell them the truth?”

“You remember on Arus, when the slaves we freed were finally released from the healing pods? They told me I’d injured your brother in a bloodthirsty rage. After that, you decided to check the Galra ship we took down for information about your dad and brother’s whereabouts.”

“God, the download rate on Arus was the slowest fucking thing. I’ve heard about dial-up internet, and I’m sure extracting data from dial-up speeds would have been faster.”

“I couldn’t just let you keep extracting the data when that ship was coming, so we pulled out. _I_ pulled you out.”

“Yeah, I was pissed at you for days after that. Your point is?”

“Sometimes you’ve got to know when to let things go. Extracting that data then wasn’t worth the cost of our lives.”

“There was no risk involved for you to defend me,” Pidge countered. “They praised you, and shit on me. And you let that happen. You let them get away with that.”

“You’re not usually one to let stuff like that get to you. You usually say something.”

Pidge glared at him. “Shiro, have you ever considered that maybe stuff like that does get to me? I already feel like a terrible mom, and it would have been _fucking_ fantastic if you stood up for me. I can fight my own battles, but we’re supposed to be a team here.”

“I’m trying, Pidge. I really am, but it’s tough when you don’t communicate with me. If something’s wrong, you tell me it’s fine. How do I know when you’re fine or when you’re not? What do you want me to do?”

“Why don’t you just go ahead and contact my mom! I’m sure _she’ll_ know what to do.”

“Fine, I will!” Shiro picked up the phone and stepped out of the room with Halley nipping at his heels. “No! Stop that!” He shooed Halley with his free hand while the other cradled the phone against his ear. “Colleen, it’s Shiro. Pidge and I —”

“Don’t drag me into this,” Pidge called from the other room. “I can handle her.”

“Excuse me, _I_ need some help with Sammy. She won’t stop crying, and we’re—” he cleared his throat. “ _I_ am at my wits’ end.”

“Give me ten minutes, and I’ll be right over.”

“Thank you so much.”

“Anytime, Shiro. Happy to help. See you guys in a little bit.” Colleen hung up.

Ten minutes. What were ten more minutes in the long scheme of things? He could handle ten more minutes of Sammy crying.

* * *

Five minutes later, the doorbell rang. Despite what she’d said to Shiro, Pidge felt better now that her mom was here to help. If anyone could figure out what had Sammy so upset (aside from a doctor), it had to be Colleen.

With Sammy’s head resting on her shoulder, Pidge made her way to the door and opened it. “Thank —” Her face fell.

“Good evening.” A pair of police officers stood at the door. “I’m Jeanie.” She was considerably chubby and perhaps one of the reasons people thought cops loved doughnuts. Upon closer inspection, however, muscles rippled beneath the layers of fat on her arms. “My partner, Cyrus, and I received a couple of noise complaints —" Cyrus pressed a fist against their mouth, either to muffle a cough or laugh — “and wanted to check in. Can we come inside?” Jeanie flashed a smile showing far too many teeth for Pidge’s liking.

“S-sure.” A bark echoed from the kitchen, prompting Pidge to slam the door in the officers’ faces. Halley would freak out at the strangers, no doubt about that. If she bit an officer, she’d be as good as dead, and Sammy might just end up in the foster care system. She’d heard too many stories from Keith about that. “Shiro, grab Halley!” she hissed.

“Oh, is Colleen already here?” He sauntered out from the kitchen to the front door and nabbed Halley by the back of her collar. “Thank goodness — oh! Can I help you, officers?”

Much to Pidge’s relief, Halley didn’t lunge at the cops, though she stood still as a statue in front of Pidge still as a statue, her hackles prickling the back of Shiro’s hand.

Jeanie rehashed her pitch, though she came off as less friendly than before. This time, Cyrus didn’t cough or laugh. Their eyes went from Shiro to Pidge, then back to Shiro, like the pendulum of a grandfather clock.

 _Probably scanning us for tell-tale signs of domestic abuse,_ Pidge thought.

“Come on in.” Shiro held the door open for the cops. “You’ll have to excuse the mess. I haven’t been able to clean up as much as I’d like. You know, new baby and all.” He added the last sentence like it wasn’t completely obvious with the five boxes of the smallest disposable diapers, pacifiers, blankets, and a bottle or two scattered around the living room. Even without any of those items, the spit-up on his shirt and the bags beneath Pidge’s eyes would’ve been enough evidence.

“Oh, I know how that goes,” Jeanie said. “My wife and I have three kids.” She stepped on a squeaky toy. “Man, your little one’s got a set of lungs on ‘em.”

“She’s usually quieter than this. I can’t think of a single night where she cried. I’m not a heavy sleeper, so I would’ve heard her. Right, Pidge?”

“It’s true.” And it was.

Jeanie whistled. “Lucky. Mine woke me up every night. Each and every one of them.”

“How’d you make them stop?” Pidge asked. “The crying, I mean.”

“It depended, but usually they were hungry, needed a change, a toy, or something else. Basic stuff.” Jeanie cleared her throat. “Anyways, about the noise complaints, one of the people who filed one thought there might’ve been a domestic disturbance or a break-in because the dog doesn’t usually bark like that. Another heard screaming, crying, and yelling. You weren’t shaking the baby, were you, ma’am? Hitting her? Choking her? Anything like that?”

“I beg your pardon?”

“It is unusual for a baby to cry for as long as these complaints stated yours did — unless they’re in pain.”

“Pidge would never do anything to hurt Sammy.” Those words came out slow and cold, though Pidge could feel the heat radiating from Shiro’s cybernetic hand as he spoke. “She’s a great mom, and I could only hope to be as good a parent as she is.”

Maybe it was the temperature rising from Shiro’s glowing hand, but the praise melted her insides, just a little bit. He’d meant what he said.

Cyrus’s jaw dropped. “I thought I recognized you! You’re Pidge! The Green Paladin!”

So they hadn’t been looking for bruises, scratches, or red marks; they thought she and Shiro looked familiar. The haircut worked! “Damn right I am.”

“I am so incredibly sorry for our conduct.” Cyrus removed their hat and held it over their heart, a sort of apologetic salute. “I should have realized who you were.”

“It’s fine,” Shiro said through a forced smile. The expression looked like it hurt.

“Can I get a selfie with you guys? We’ll overlook this.”

“Cyrus!” Color rose to Jeanie’s pale cheeks. “You can’t just —”

“Aw, come on, Jeanie. They’re the Paladins; they’d never do anything to hurt anyone, especially not their own kid. Besides…” Cyrus winked. “We all know you have the biggest crush on Pidge.”

Jeanie’s face grew redder.

As much as Pidge wanted to be angry with these officers, she couldn’t. She felt a twinge of pity for Jeanie. Being pale made it so damn hard to hide feelings, and Jeanie was almost the same shade as Pidge; only a smidge darker. “I’ll pass on the selfie,” Pidge said. “And I would welcome an inspection, actually. You’ll find nothing wrong here.”

Cyrus pouted, only for Shiro to hold out a hand. “Give me your phone,” he said.

“O-of course!” Cyrus fumbled for their phone, which appeared to be buried in a hidden pocket of their uniform. “Here!”

Shiro’s plastered-on smile relaxed into a natural one. He held up the phone and adjusted it to a less-than-flattering angle. “OK, on the count of three… one… two… three.” _Click._ Shiro returned the phone to Cyrus, who ogled at the selfie with a slack jaw. “Is this OK?”

The selfie was out of focus, and a silver thumb covered up a sliver of the image. “It’s perfect,” Cyrus whispered, either too shy to request a better selfie or too excited to notice any flaws in the image. “Thank you so much!”

“Uh-huh.” Shiro looked back to Pidge and Jeanie, who were headed upstairs, presumably to show Jeanie where Sammy slept. And of course, Halley wasn’t far behind.

“You’d better keep an eye on that one.” Cyrus tilted their head toward Jeanie. “She might walk out with your girl.”

Shiro snorted. “She’s not my girl. I don’t own Pidge. And besides, I’ve got nothing to worry about. Pidge has only got eyes for three things: robots, dogs, and Sammy.”

“Oof.”

He flexed his cybernetic arm. “As I said, I’ve got nothing to worry about.”

Cyrus laughed until they had to wipe tears out the corners of their eyes.

“Thanks, I’ll be here all night.” Shiro glanced back up toward the stairs. _But hopefully not awake all night._

* * *

Halley huffed. The two people in blue were gone, and Peanut and Metalpaw smelled significantly less stressed… but Puppy. Poor little Puppy hadn’t stopped howling. Why that was, Halley couldn’t begin to guess, but clearly Puppy needed something. Maybe she could at least help?

She bit into the fabric of Peanut’s pant leg and pulled.

“No, Halley.”

She huffed again. No. No, no, no, no! She hated that word. She was just trying to help, but no one was listening to her! Maybe she’d have to make them listen… but how?

Peanut was the more difficult of the pair to reason with. It didn’t matter how cute she made herself look or how good she was being; Peanut was stubborn and set in her ways.

Metalpaw was much more malleable. One sad look would have him rolling over in defeat! Or at least giving her a treat or letting her pull ahead on the leash.

Halley scrabbled up on to Metalpaw’s lap, whining and licking his face as he laughed. “Halley, not now! Halley! Stop it!” What did he want her to stop? Being on his lap? Kisses? She started to crawl over to Peanut, who pet Puppy’s back in a soothing manner. Did Puppy not like pets behind the ear? Everyone knew that behind-the-ear pets were the best pets! Then again, Puppy’s ears, like her parents’ ears, were smaller than Halley’s and probably didn’t pick up sound all that well.

“Pidge, can’t you do something about your dog?”

“ _Our_ dog needs some attention, and she knows my hands are too full to supply her with it.” Pidge bounced Sammy a little bit. “Thanks for earlier. And I’m sorry.”

Shiro made a shushing sound, which earned him an icy glare from Pidge. “That was for Sammy, not you.” He reached past Sammy and cupped his wife’s face with a cool hand. “I’m sorry about earlier. I should have said something. You were right.”

“I always am.”

He pulled his cybernetic hand away, ashamed, like he wasn’t worthy of touching her. “I liked the attention I got. It was nice to get that recognition as someone other than Champion, as the Black Paladin. That didn’t make it right. I should’ve said something to those women on the walk when they went after you, and I didn’t. I’m sorry.”

“Thank you.”

The doorbell rang.

Halley swiveled her head toward the direction of the sound but stayed put. She nudged her nose against Peanut’s hand, and therefore, against Puppy’s back.

“Shiro, would you mind getting it?” Pidge asked.

Shiro gave Pidge’s thigh a gentle squeeze before rising from his spot on the couch. He brushed off as much dog fur as he could — there was only so much he could do to straighten up for his mother-in-law — and headed on toward the door. His hand shook as he jiggled the door handle. _Stupid nerves._ Yet seeing Colleen on the porch drained him of any anxiety he’d had about her thinking her daughter making a mistake marrying him, having a baby with him, so on and so forth. If anything, he felt relief, and that had to be a first. “I’m so glad you’re here.”

In typical Holt fashion, Colleen’s mind was at least five sentences ahead of Shiro in terms of greeting. “I saw a police car pull out of your driveway. Is everything alright?”

Shiro held the door for Colleen and tilted his head toward the living room — the source of Sammy’s cries. “Noise complaint.”

“Oh, Sammy…” Colleen’s expression grew wistful, a little teary, even, when she said her granddaughter’s name. She blinked owlishly through the swift moment of grief, gone almost as soon as it came over her. A corner of her mouth twitched into a half-smirk. “Sounds like someone is not happy.” She slipped her shoes off, swept past Shiro, and made a sharp turn into the living room.

“New haircut, huh?” Colleen settled down next to Pidge. Her poor daughter looked beyond exhausted, with bags beneath the eyes big enough to pack for traveling off-planet for a solid month. Had it not been for Sammy screaming in her arms, Pidge might’ve passed out not long ago. “Haven’t seen you with hair this short since…” Colleen trailed off.

Pidge filled in the blank: _Since you ran away to find Sam and Matt._ “It was getting to be too much work,” Pidge said a bit too quickly, voice strained under the weights of stress and irritation.

“I think it looks great.” Shiro perched on the arm of the sofa and shuffled over to Halley’s usual spot on the couch. “She looks just like the Green Paladin I fell in love with.” Then it hit him: That was why she cut her hair. So people would recognize her, not as a mother, but as the hero who saved the universe on multiple occasions.

“Plus, Sammy liked getting her hands all tangled up in it when I nursed her. Nothing says ‘I’m a bad mom’ more than letting your hair get all sticky with milk, and you haven’t washed or brushed it in days because you’re too busy worrying about your baby.” Pidge laughed.

Her audience exchanged concerned looks. “What? It’s a joke. Come on, laugh! It’s a joke!”

Colleen threaded her fingers through Pidge’s hair. As a reflex, Pidge’s eyelids grew heavier with each stroke, bringing her closer and closer to sleep. “You are not a bad mom. You’re a new mom who needs a break.” The soothing strokes running through Pidge’s cropped hair slowed to a stop. “Here, I’ll take her.”

Just as Pidge’s eyes were about to close, they snapped open, bloodshot and wide-eyed. “No!” Her fingers dug into Sammy’s back. Sammy howled at the unfamiliar sensation, more upset than before. Pidge reeled back and apologized over and over and over again to her daughter.

Upon hearing Puppy’s pained howls, Halley took it upon herself to join her family on the couch. Metalpaw, clever beast that he was, had stolen her spot, which meant she had to _make_ room for herself. She shoved Colleen, who moved over a little bit. It wasn’t comfortable, but at least she could be there for Puppy.

“Katie, you need some rest.”

Pidge’s lower lip quivered. “I can’t.” Her gaze fixed down at a crying, hiccuping Sammy. She rubbed Sammy’s back in slow, soothing circles.

Colleen glanced over to Shiro. “Is Sammy keeping you guys up at night?”

Shiro and Pidge answered at the same time:

“No.”

“Yes.”

Colleen looked back and forth between Shiro and Pidge. “That doesn’t add up.”

Feeling the heat of Colleen’s stern (or was it thoughtful?) gaze, Shiro piped up first. “She hasn’t woken up in the middle of the night.” He looked to Pidge for support. “Has she?”

Pidge shook her head. “You’re a light sleeper. If she woke up crying, you’d be awake first. She’s never cried at night. Not once.”

“Consider yourselves lucky,” Colleen muttered. “You two must have the most chill baby ever.”

“But she’s keeping you up, right?”

A sigh long enough to be confused for a yawn slipped out of Pidge’s mouth. “Not exactly.” She drew in a deep breath. “I’m scared to sleep.”

Colleen continued to stroke her daughter’s hair. “She doesn’t sleep _in_ your bed, does she?”

“No, Mom.” Pidge laughed bitterly. “Both of us are too scared we’d crush her in our sleep. It’s more…” she faltered for a brief moment. “I’m scared that I’ll wake up, and she’s gone.”

“Gone?” Shiro echoed. “As in, she disappeared?”

“Worse.” Pidge spoke so quietly, Shiro and Colleen had to lean in so they could hear her. “Dead.” A dam inside of Pidge broke, releasing a flood of emotions — fear, grief, terror, anxiety — and tears. “I-if something were to happen to her, I don’t… I don’t know what I’d do. I almost lost her once, and if it happened for real, I…”

Shiro’s vision blurred. Had giving Pidge space been the wrong decision? Why didn’t he try to get her to talk to him? He blinked back tears with some success. “Katie, I can’t promise you that nothing will happen to her, but I can help you get some sleep if you want. Let me take a shift.”

Pidge’s hand paused mid-rub, leaving in its stead an unfinished circle on the back of Sammy’s onesie. “That’s—” _Tempting._ A very tempting offer. But if something went wrong, it’d be her fault.

Recognizing the thoughts stewing behind her eyes, Shiro pressed a hand against her thigh and gave it a gentle squeeze. “I’ll wake you up if I think anything is wrong. I promise.”

“Just take his offer,” Colleen snapped. She nabbed Sammy from her mother’s arms, only to be stopped by a yelp from Halley and the realization that Sammy’s screams ceased. “What on earth? Halley, I didn’t even touch you.”

A sigh of relief slipped through Pidge’s lips. “But Sammy did, the little hair-puller that she is.” Sammy’s grubby little fist, roughly the same size as Halley’s nose, gripped the dog’s fur like Velcro. Pulling Sammy away from Halley would undoubtedly hurt the dog and rip the fur out of her back, though Halley didn’t appear to mind. She licked Sammy’s cheek until no tears remained.

Colleen raised a brow. “Katie, where was Sammy when you cut your hair?”

“I’d just put her down for a nap, and — oh. Oh!” Pidge clapped a hand to her forehead. How the hell had she not realized… Sammy didn’t recognize her without the long hair. She didn’t know where her mom had gone, even though Pidge had been here all day. Poor thing probably thought her own mother was a stranger. How could she fix this? It wasn’t like Pidge could grow her hair back immediately. “What do I do?”

“Give her time and space,” Colleen said.” She’ll adjust to the change. Just try to keep everything else as normal as possible. And there’s one more thing.”

“What?”

“Get some sleep, and cut yourself some slack.”

Shiro shot Pidge an “I-told-you-so” look.

Colleen shot Shiro an icy glare. “That goes for you, too, Shiro.”

At that, Shiro deflated. Amazing how all it took was one sentence from Colleen to take a pin to pop his balloon of an ego.

“Take her.” Colleen freed Halley from Sammy’s tiny iron grip and handed her off to Shiro. “You two are doing a great job. Parenting is hard work, and goodness knows you’ve been through hell with this one already.”

Shiro nudged Pidge with an elbow. “It can only get better from here, right?”

Colleen chuckled. “Sure, just wait until the terrible twos and threes.” She gave her daughter and son-in-law a hug — taking care not to crush Sammy in the latter — and headed out the door, but not without a reminder to call her if they needed help.

It wasn’t until Colleen closed the door behind her that Shiro and Pidge felt the toll of the day’s events.

Halley stretched with a mighty yawn, then made a beeline for the stairs. She stopped at the top and stared expectantly at Peanut, Metalpaw, and Puppy.

“I think we should follow her lead,” Shiro said. He offered Pidge a hand, which she took without complaint. “Also, I’m calling dibs on the first shift with Sammy.”

“Asshole,” Pidge grumbled, though the smile on her face was at odds with her tone. “If anything’s even remotely off, you’ll wake me up?”

“I made you a promise, and I intend to keep it.”

* * *

A scarce handful of stars twinkled in the night sky in Phoenix, Arizona. The sight, as beautiful as it was, was not the one Shiro watched. He rocked back and forth in the chair he’d taken from the nursery, grinning from ear to ear as he observed his precious baby girl sleep peacefully as she sucked on her pacifier, never to be haunted by traumatic night terrors of the past as he did.

Halley ditched her usual post at the foot of the bed; instead, she snored at the base of the bassinet with one ear perked. Maybe it was the canine equivalent of sleeping with one eye open.

The chair’s rocking stopped when Pidge stirred. “Shiro?” Her voice was husky from sleep.

“Yeah?”

She rubbed an eye. “Is she OK?”

“She’s great.”

“Good.” Pidge rolled over to her other side, facing away from Shiro. “Thirty more minutes, please.”

Shiro chuckled. “Of course, love. Take as long as you need.”

That night was a silent one, save for the dog’s snores, the rocking chair’s squeaks, and the swish of blankets. After eight years of being together and living together, these were the sounds Shiro had never anticipated hearing. Now, he couldn’t imagine life without them.

As he sat there, watching and listening to his girls ( _his_ family!) sleep, he hoped he would never take these peaceful moments for granted.

(He never would.)


End file.
